(Over)thoughts | A glimpse into the chaos.

Hygienist

Posted on May 31 2019 by J.W. Richmond

Recently I went to the dentist.
While the hygienist
was examining
and counting
and poking
and scraping
and cleaning,
she also gave me a haircut,
since apparently that was part of the procedure.

She never asked
how I wanted my hair.
And she cut bangs.
Short ones.

I never had a chance
to tell her what I wanted –
numbness
and fingers
and metal tools
in my mouth
so I couldn’t speak.

But she was skilled
and crafty
and evidently handsy
to do all that
at once.

I kind of
admired her for that.

And then I woke up.

Scrambly

Posted on April 28 2019 by J.W. Richmond

Tuesdays

How could he explain
the inconceivable
iridescent
pieces
of impossible
attempting to escape
from within his brain?

They were small
surly
sc r a m b ly
shimmery
swirly
whimsical
fantastical
fanatical
illogical
and clearly didn’t know
where they were meant
to remain.

(Un)Knowns

Posted on March 31 2019 by J.W. Richmond

How do you/I not
be concerned with
possibilities
questions
think through
as much as possible
that might happen?

Knowing, of course,
you can never know
everything,
how do you
prepare for the future
for various scenarios
for likely possibilities
if you’re ignoring
what’s impending
or
what could be
directly in front of you shortly?

Knowns linger
hang
cling
while unknowns
CLANG
BANG
CRASH
into everything,
causing further damage
every second
they aren’t contained
or
sought after.

Incongruous

Posted on February 24 2019 by J.W. Richmond

Many Faces

This persistent
nagging feeling
that I cannot explain
or fully understand
is maddening –
an intangible sense
with no way to know
if I’m accurate
or not
(yet)
with no empirical evidence
or specific details
to point to,
only a deep distress
inside
that something
isn’t
right.
I acknowledge
I could be incorrect,
but somewhere
in the shadows
there is a disconnect.
Something
incongruous
exists
even if I cannot identify it.
I don’t know
what it is;
I just know
something
is wrong.

Ponder

Posted on January 26 2019 by J.W. Richmond

My life always feels
rushed
and pushed
packed
and crammed
and overwhelming.

I never feel like
I can catch up
enough
to check off the list
or step back
to evaluate
or take some time
to be
to think
to ponder
and slow down enough
to wander
and
wonder
why certain words rhyme
when they shouldn’t
and others don’t
when they seem like
they would.

There is always
too much to do
too much that is required of me
work to be done
chores to complete
errands to run
people to see
and books to read
and too much
in my head
that I’m always trying
to figure out
how to get out.

And ‘tis the season
of much
and
more
and
overdoing
beyond excess.

But it never stops
finishes
concludes
even when the season goes
or returns
or leaves again.

Insanity

Posted on December 29 2018 by J.W. Richmond

Away in a Manger

The biblical account
of the birth of Jesus
is horrifying!

Angels appear from nowhere
and speak to people
and tell them
not to be afraid (Luke 1:26-30, Luke 2:9-10, 13-14).
Sure, no fear here.

There are several occurrences
of dream angels
and
dream warnings (Matthew 1:20; Matthew 2:12, 13, 19, 22; Luke 2:28).
Not spooky at all.

There is a virgin mother (Matthew 1:23; Luke 1:31-35),
<insert confused face>
which is nonsensical
and defies logic
and science
and her more than boyfriend/
not quite fiance/
betrothed/
pledged/
husband (Matthew 1:18-19, Luke 2:5) –
whatever the term for this complicated relationship
would be in this century –
who is ready to bolt
and leave her
to raise this unborn mystery baby alone (Matthew 1:19).

There is a star
that moves across the sky
and then hovers over this child
and His family (Matthew 2:9).
Science questions again…

There is a horribly wicked king –
and no words awful enough to describe him –
who plots to kill this baby
after He is born (Matthew 2:13)
then decrees infanticide throughout the region,
ordering the deaths of countless baby boys
in hopes that he gets lucky
and the particular boy he wants dead
will happen to be one of them (Matthew 2:16).
Seriously, even the vilest words
are too trivial for him.

And there is a young family
who flees for their safety
in the middle of the night
and moves to another country
to escape from said king (Matthew 2:14-15).

The details of the birth of Jesus
are crazy
and terrifying
and nothing like
the beautiful pictures
or the Christmas carols
or cute ornaments
or nativity scenes.
Yet this is how the Savior
entered the world.
What insanity!
What a farfetched story.
No one would ever believe it
if it weren’t true.

Freeing

Posted on November 30 2018 by J.W. Richmond

Orange in Black and White

It feels good to push myself
to do something
different
to grow.

Even when my drawings
paintings
photographs
are amateur
inaccurate
incomplete
or
look like
a kindergartener
could have done them,
it’s f r e e i n g
to allow myself
to learn
and be in process,
and hopefully
over time
I will improve.

Even if I never become
an expert,
the process of learning
is valuable
in itself.

Guiltless

Posted on October 30 2018 by J.W. Richmond

Simple Generosity

This October
has been a month of constant
obligations
requirements
expectations.
We usually look forward to October –
a reprieve
from summer
overhyped holidays
and
the everyday norm.

But this one
was hijacked.

We might have to spend this Halloween
hiding out
with the lights off
to recover
from everything that was stolen
from us.
There is still
so much impending
that I just want to try
to enjoy what is left of the fall
while we can
before it disappears
yet again.

Thankfully,
Halloween is a generous holiday
that gives people what they need.

We can hand out candy to kids
go to a party with friends
or enjoy a break from people altogether
because there is nothing mandatory
about Halloween.
It’s all about fun –
however you define it.
And if you need rest instead,
there is no guilt
in allowing yourself
to accept it.

For so many reasons,
Halloween is absolutely
my favorite.

Blues

Posted on September 23 2018 by J.W. Richmond

There in the blues
in the outlines
of the branches
over the water
and the sky,
the shadow of them
was there –
not oppressive
just present –
because it was one of their favorites too.

The same view
from the year before
from the same spot,
yet a single year later
they’re no longer here
to share it with.

It made me
miss them more
and
love them more
and
picture them more,
sad they’re not here
and
glad to know
they are with Jesus
and together again,
with no more sadness
and even more beautiful views
than this.