SUPER

The Superglue Emergency Kit
The Superglue Emergency Kit

A PSA for anyone else who gets
                    stuck
             in this situation
             in the future:

Some advice came in SUPER handy recently
     when I – I mean, my friend
          had a huge
                    messy mishap
               with a new bottle
                    of apparently extra,
                                        extra-strong superglue
                          with an opening
                                that was much   w   i     d    e    r
                                        than normal.

When attempting to glue
     some broken puzzle pieces
                     back together,
               it got all over my her hands.

While – unsuccessfully – trying
     to clean everything up,
               my her fingers got stuck together.
                         Solidly.
Tugs
        prying
                         pulling
                              and maneuvering
     were initially futile,
               but after many long,
                                       frustrating minutes,
                                                      they separated.

After finally ripping them apart,
     I – I mean, she
          tried to Google
                    how to remove super glue from skin
               but couldn't open my her phone right away
                         because my her fingerprints
                              were covered
                                   solidly
                                   in
                                   glue.

Another phone-opening method worked, thankfully,
     and Google came to the rescue
               with some suggestions.

Eventually, after a combination
     of tons of warm water
         many different types and brands of soap
               (that did absolutely nothing),
         a hard, dry Scrub Daddy sponge,
         lots of acetone nail polish remover,
         a slathering of lotion
         some Vaseline,
         a nail file,
              and bouts of uncontrollable laughter
                         at the ridiculousness of it all,
                    the glue – finally – relented
                         and peeled off.
                              (Mostly.)