Better is a pleasant, efficient faucet than a leaky, irksome wife.
Or something like that.
Then there is the Proverbs 31 woman, who seems superhuman. This perfect, energetic wife is so amazing in everything she does and who she is to the point where she is blessed and worthy of praise, surpassing all others (Proverbs 31:10-31).
I can’t help but picture a Disney character with long, flowing hair and a cute little dress, a permanent smile across her face, birds, because well, there would have to be birds, and breathy la la la’s that are always on cue and always the perfect pitch.
Noble, strong and dignified are likely not words someone would use to describe me. Awkward, odd and slightly disheveled might be more accurate.
I don’t get up while it is still dark and accomplish a full day’s work before other people wake up. There are many days I am not even fully awake for at least an hour after I get up.
Although I work very hard, I don’t always have something concrete to show for the hours I put in, much less something I could sell. And my paycheck lacks zeros. Any parcel of land I could purchase from my earnings would be brought home in a bag and dumped onto grounds owned by the bank.
I can’t keep up with the windows/baseboards/grout/ceiling fans/etc. in our house or keep everything shiny and immaculate. By the time I do finish the list, it’s long past time to start all over again.
I can re-sew a button on a shirt using the little travel kit you find in a hotel room, but my sewing skills end there. I knew flax was a good source of fiber, but until I looked it up, I didn’t know it was an actual fiber used to make linen.
As much as I wish I had noble character, I know I am severely flawed. I care for others, but I’m not sure I faithfully instruct them, and I don’t always take the time and effort to reach out to help those in need.
Speaking with wisdom isn’t exactly a strength of mine. Most days, I can’t even get words to come out of my mouth without them stumbling all over themselves. And sometimes they drip with cruelty, and I wish I could reel them back in.
I don’t read my Bible every single day, and I don’t intrinsically understand everything I do read. I fear God, revere Him and marvel at how big He really is, but then another day goes by that I haven’t spent time with Him.
I am not an accomplished, gourmet chef who buys all their fresh, beautiful fruit from the weekly farmer’s market. I don’t make dinner every night, much less breakfast and lunch every day. My pantry and I recently discovered that potatoes can actually liquefy, and their stench doesn't quickly dissipate, which made me even more thankful for frozen vegetables and a microwave.
A vineyard would be laughable for me to start, much less maintain. Without help from my husband and the Weed Man service, our entire yard would be weeds. I can barely keep our single houseplant from dying.
What I do strive for is to be the equivalent of the non-drippy faucet of the un-quarrelsome wife (Proverbs 19:13, Proverbs 21:9), to apologize quickly when I speak harshly, not nag or screech, and to make our home a place Jeff wants to come home to, not something he dreads or avoids.
Our home is never perfect, and although it is mostly clean, things aren’t always in their place and it is a constant work in progress. I do what I can to make it a relaxing, comfortable refuge where he can unwind, enjoy his time, and not enter into a den of bitterness and filth.
I won’t ever be the dainty, frilly Disney princess, and I will probably never live up to the incredible superwoman from Proverbs 31.
But with His grace, hopefully I can and will be the wife of my husband’s youth (Proverbs 5:18) who highly respects and deeply loves him, who brings him good, not harm (Proverbs 31:12), and who always supports him to help him be the man of God he was made to be, so he will lack nothing of true value (Proverbs 31:11).