It’s not relaxing,
not really,
unless the relaxing
is able to happen
after the impending.
Trying to force it
ahead of time
only compounds the doom
of what ‘s coming.
Sure, to some minor extent,
it helps to be able to disengage a little
if possible.
But I can’t ignore
or turn off
the dreaded known.
I need to be able
to put the draining stuff behind me,
get past it
in order to actually
relax.
Work hard
hard
harder
push, push, push
go
do it
do it
do it now,
then play
or relax
for real
after.