I’m not sure I pray – enough.
Not enough
as in long enough
or often enough.
Although I’m sure both of those are true.
But thoroughly enough.
I’m not sure I always pray through
the possibility of what God may want
or do
with whatever He has placed in my life –
no matter how much I may hate whatever it is.
Because whatever it is, is so bad
that no one should ever have to live it
endure it
exist in it.
And I would never wish whatever it is on another person.
Anyone else who doesn’t have some horrible malice or vendetta against someone would come to the same conclusion about my circumstance. Right?
So why wouldn’t He think that too?
Or bother to remove it from my life?
Because I know He can.
Am I doing something wrong?
What if I prayed for something different?
I can what-if that scenario to a bloody mess
and never have any actual answers.
What do I know is
He is God.
And I am not.
I’m not praying for something bad
wrong
immoral.
But – maybe – there is something He knows
that I don’t.
And maybe I should be praying
differently.
What would
could
might happen next time
if I think past my prayer
that isn’t necessarily wrong, but incomplete?
If I think past my immediate distress
or gigantic in-my-face circumstances
or admittedly sometimes selfish needs
and pray more thoroughly?
Would my tiny change in prayer
really make that big of a difference?
Would it fix things
circumstances
outcomes?
I don’t know.
But maybe it would make a difference in how I view
see
perceive things.
And that might make a difference
in how I perceive Him.